Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Elder’s Corner: The Blame Game

The other day I found a meditation which I would like to share with you.

When Ahab saw [Elijah], he said, “So there you are—the worst troublemaker in Israel!” (1 Kings 18: 16b) Why do we find it so easy to look for the cause of our troubles outside ourselves? Playing the blame game is a common tendency. Even though King Ahab “sinned against the Lord more than any of his predecessors,” (1 Kings 16:30), he blamed the prophet Elijah for his problems. It’s true that sometimes the actions of others cause us harm, but it is also true that when we’re feeling guilty or our own self-esteem is on shaky ground, our egos—seeking self-preservation—point the finger elsewhere. We think, “Well, I may have done X, but look at what they’re doing. I’m not that bad.”
 We look at the wrongs of others—real or imagined—to feel better by comparison, but comparing ourselves to others can also work against us. When people quietly go about their own lives with integrity we can feel criticized by implication. It’s as if their virtue shows us up and makes us feel shabby about ourselves.
 When we blame others for our problems, we get to feel better about ourselves temporarily without having to take responsibility or clean up our own messes. We fail to grow when we do that. Even if nobody else finds out, we know the truth. In those moments of solitude when we have no one else to look down on, we know that our poor choices and character flaws have contributed—at least in part—to our own troubles. Once we become willing to acknowledge our own mistakes and shortcomings, we have genuine hope for improvement.
 Do we want to continue to point the finger at others for the sake of appearances or do we want to honestly look within, lovingly accept what we find, and become willing to do something about our biggest enemy—ourselves, so that we can grow? Do we want to look better or do we want to actually be better?
 Prayer: Lord, may I trust your love enough to acknowledge my faults and seek help in overcoming them.
 Reflection: How am I contributing to the problems facing me today?
--Enrique


Originally written in Bible Meditations.net “Saturday Spotlight: Ahab”; available from http://www.biblemeditations.net/archives/1893

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